In May 2017, I was once again obsessed with my weight; I focused on the scale and what I ate rather than the issues truthfully bothering me. In 2014 I had successfully completed the Grace and Strength program, only to fall back into old patterns when we moved to another state. The weight was creeping back, I needed help. I came up with many excuses such as living in a hotel for 5 weeks, the chaos of moving and finding a new church, making new friends etc. Bottom line is that self-discipline and adherence to a plan of living that was healthy, had slipped. I realized that I had unfinished work to do and I humbly returned to Grace and Strength because I knew the root problems that lead to my sin of gluttony would be confronted.
Jeremiah 29:12 “Then you will call upon Me and come and pray to Me, and I will listen to you”.
Was the process easy? No. I decided that I would be as obedient and compliant as possible. Daily I surrender my will and my life over to God’s will for me. I certainly have had my ups and downs, my victories, my stalls, and challenges. But God’s timing has proven itself again and again on this journey. Learning to rely on Jesus for everything has been another source of transformation and growth. This has not been easy for a woman with “control issues”. But God tells us, (Philippians 4:19) “And God will meet all your needs according to the riches of His glory in Christ Jesus”.
The weekly group calls, accountability, and the Bible studies plus God ministering to us directly and through Coach April was what brought continued healing of my spirit, mind and body. It will be challenging, you will learn about yourself and the amazing way God created and loves you. (Luke 1:37) “For nothing will be impossible with God”. The other amazing thing that happens is God places women in your group that will minister to you, you will minister to them and you learn and heal together.
How am I different? I am learning my identity in Christ. I am learning to respect and nurture myself as I have done for family, friends and thousands of patients during my career as a critical care nurse. I have healthy boundaries for eating as well as my life. I am learning to be patient, loving, forgiving and accepting of myself and others. I am realizing areas of sin in my life that I am cleaning up. God is in control, and I am relieved not to be burdened with the woes of the world. I am heathy and strong.
Am I finished? Yes and no. This portion of my journey is coming to an end, but I will need to stay within the boundaries, listen to God and continue with lifestyle changes that are becoming healthy habits for the rest of my life. And I see my commitment as a joyful, victorious, freedom.
Respectfully submitted September 28, 2017, Zoe Schultz
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